Lao Ah Pek and Xiao Mei Meis
by alano, the cheekopek
Today there was a Lao Ah Pek waiting for his Gay Lao Ah Pek friend at Orchard MRT Platform there and as his Gay Lao Ah Pek friend was ONE FREAKING HOUR late, the Lao Ah Pek was sitting at the railings there, doing wat else but what all cheeko lao ah peks do - look at all the Xiao Mei Mei's prancing (and some, bouncing if you know what i mean) to and fro the underpass. Suddenly, one Lao Ah Ma walked towards the Lao Ah Pek and asked him lots of questions. The Lao Ah Pek, as he was sibeh humsup, agreed to do the survey. Then, the tiko Lao Ah Pek proceeded to chat with the Lao Ah Ma, like machiam friend like tat. Wah Lan Eh, sibeh tiko.
Then hor, after the Lao Ah Ma went to hunt for other preys, one Xiao Mei Mei waved at the Lao Ah Pek as she bounced towards him. With just a few words, the xiao mei mei successfully 'kope-d' $5 from the Lao Ah Pek because of course, he was a chao tiko Lao Ah Pek. Soon after, one Xiao Di Di walked (he didn't bounce, or should i say he couldn't; for obvious reasons) towards the Lao Ah Pek and ask him for $5 too. The Lao Ah Pek look at the Xiao Di Di and said no. "KNN! si tiko chao humsup lao peh peh. only donate and entertain girls one. kns." must have been what was on the Xiao Di Di's mind, the cheeko Lao Ah Pek thought as he continued to enjoy the 'scenery'.
Then ONE HOUR later, the gay lao ah pek friend came. Hmm..tat sounds very wrong. Very.
So Ya.
The moral of the story is, don't wait for your friends at Orchard Mrt Platform Underpass Area. Unless of course,
1. You are rich and can donate $5 to every single Chao Ah Lian and Chao Ah Beng that approaches you to ask you to donate to whatever Kukubird Organisation.
2. You rather pay $5 to "look at scenery". which, i tell you from my.. i mean, lao ah pek's experience is definitely worth it.
3. You don't have a GAY friend that will make you wait one hour at the MRT.
Ya anyway this is so totally random and a useless waste of time come to think of it.
But hey, wait you may ask.. Why call yourself Lao Ah Pek? I mean you're only 18+ what. Well, that brings me to my next point.
I AM BALDING.
LIKE A LAO AH PEK.
SO THAT MAKES ME A CHEEKOPEKZHANJI NOW.
Ya.. for the past 3 times cutting hair at 3 different salons, they all said the same thing that i was balding. I chose not to believe them until now. Cos i know for myself that i really AM dropping hair. Sighs. IM ONLY 18!!! and i have WHITE hair and BALDING head. MAN. MY PRECIOUS HAIR. my preciousssssss..
So yeah, i have to feed my hair bird's nest and chicken essence everyday from now on. Hope it grows healthily and not fall off.
Maybe i should go for hair transplant. And put my pubic hair on my head. Then i'll be a dickhead! HAHAHA. K, not funny. Eh then when the hairdressers blow my hair then ******************The following have been censored by blogger due to the maturity of the particular content involved***********
So ya. Anyway while shopping around Far East, i saw Hong JunYang.
Ya.
WELL, if i was a young prematured little girl, the above sentence would actually look more like:
todae hor... me and my dearx kaikai-ing around far east leh.. then i turned around and i saw HONG JUNYANG!! *add some dramatic action like "screams and melts" or "chase after him and kiss him"* He real life hen SHUAI worx. ai shi ta le! *muacksMUACKS!_-+~ zhen de hen shuai. then i took picture with him!! I TOOK PICTURE WITH JUNYANG LEH! *adds some orgasmic feeling word here* WO YONG YUAN AI NI JUNYANG!
Man i'm gonna get flamed here.
It's ok, Weijian is my friend!! (j: HAHAHA!)
Anyway, this Hong JunYang was alone when we passed by him. He dyed his hair brown like blonde like tat and there were 2 girls behind him giggling and pushing each other to take the initiative to either
1.Say Hi
2.Take picture
3. Autograph
4. Have Sex
Yeah anyway he was alone. Why was he alone? At Far East somemore. Hmm.. i don't know.. it feels weird to me. Why the hell do i even bother. NEXT!
So ya, i need to leave house in exactly 7 hours time and catch a lift from Yiling and her mum. So ya.. 9am at Tanah Merah Ferry Terminal but they wana go some place eat ?Nasi Lemak? or something, which obviously i can't as i can't eat breakfast especially when it's so early. Oh well.
I have a feeling i overpacked. Its only Bintan and im carrying so many stuffs and it doesn't help that my whole body is aching cos of soccer yesterday! I'm going to die.
*CHOY CHOY* TOUCH WOOD* I DON"T WANA DIE STILL A CHILD.. STILL STUDYING.. STILL SO YOUNG...
still a virgin.
